A Special Meeting of Spirit Guides


For the last several years, wishing for a dear female friend, I found that wishing is not sanctioned by a culture which measures age.  It used to be, that I’d wish for someone to touch my life and sure enough, I’d find someone perfect.  Now I find that if we’ve lost our dear friend after many years, we’re supposed not to care, any more, for anyone.  In these times, lacking a friend, I gradually became ready to die.  At least this decision brought a meeting of my spirit guides.

“Isn’t about time for me to die?”  I said, a thought in my mind after a long talk now forgotten.

“So long as you have a gift to give,” one of the spirits said, “it isn’t time for dying.”

How many times, I thought, have friends in spirit said that to mortals?  “Is that true?” I said.  “There have been millions who had gifts to give, and they got to die.”

At the left of the long curved table in front of me, a young spirit spoke.  Not words. of course, just thoughts.  “You know nothing about the understanding of the millions, but you’re telling us there was no reason for them to die?”

Oh, I thought.  Did I speak too soon?  “Maybe not for millions, I don’t know.  But I  knew my brother.”

A gentle response from a wise one.  “Did you know his agreement?  Did you talk with him about it?  Did you suggest that he could change his plans?”

“I was his little brother!” I said.  “I didn’t know anything about contracts!”

The silence was their answer.  I retreated.  “Well, he could have told me, at least.”

Soft words, from a lovely spirit, “If you were Bobby, would you have told little ten-year-old Dickie that it was time for you to die?”

My turn for silence.  Long silence.  Then a whisper I could barely hear,  “…no.”

“Do you think he might have known you were going to be all right?  The less you knew, the better you’d feel?  His belief of dying, and yours, do you know it’s all part of your plan?”

I thought about that.  Did my brother have a plan?  Do I?  His plan he remembered, and mine, I’ve forgotten?

A gentle reminder.  “Mortals are sometimes impatient.  You have a few little tests yet to finish.  You’ve done most of them all these years, as you say.  It’s no failure if you choose to die now.”

“Remember what I said, in a book?  That most of us die by accident or illness?  Suicide was the way for Jesus, but not for me.  I haven’t made that many enemies, I hope, and it’s not important for them to kill me.  The only  thoughtful way I can think of dying, these days, is by ascending.  In perfect health, a decision to let this world go, and I leave my belief of a body to vanish in the air.”












A careful response.  “You can do that.  Have you practiced, to make it happen?”


“Have you studied, do you know from a book, or from a friend in spirit, what you need to make an ascension happen?”


A different voice.  “Do you know that every death is an ascension?  A trail of decisions and all at once…”

“So accidents,” I said, “illness, those are ascensions, too?”

“They are decisions to leave one world for another.”

“I don’t agree.  They’re failures, to me.  I’ll fail too, if I’m tired enough, lonely enough.  I would prefer ascending, if you don’t mind.  If you do mind, a conventional death will be fine for me.  Not perfect, but good enough.”

A voice from the right of the table.  “Have you thought about what would happen in the minds of other mortals if you ascended?”

“No, I haven’t.  Do I care?”


“Do you want me to think about that now?”

“Just quickly, that would be good for us to hear.”

“Quickly.  If people saw me ascending, or if I ascended alone?”

“If you ascend alone, it will be called illness.  Heart failure, stroke, accident…”

“So I’ll have some visitors,” I said.  “Then I’ll just leave my body…  Well, I’d have to sit down, or they’ll say the fall killed me.  So I’ll be nice and comfortable in a chair, and my spirit leaves: a burst of light, and my body gets all sparkly, and it’s gone.”

“That’s it?”

“I think that’s it, yes.”

“Your friends will tell the story about that?  ‘And then in a bright light, Richard just left his body!   There were sparkly things and his body vanished.’”

Uh-oh.  I sensed trouble coming.

“Your friends, they’d tell the truth?”

“Yes.  Of course they will,” I said.  “Something like that.”


“Is that OK?”  I said.  “The truth…”

“Has anyone done that?  In a hundred years?  A thousand?  Ever?  Do you know anyone who ever ascended at the end of their life?  What you call the end of your life.”

“Some say it’s happened…”

“Pretend, now.  If you did this thing, would you be considered a normal human being?  ‘And his body turned all sparkly.’  Is that normal, for mortals?”

“I’ll ask them not to tell about that.”

“It’s that or the heart failure, a stroke.  You said they have to tell the truth.”

“Truth.  OK.”

The lovely one again.  “And when they saw your ascension, you would not be…human, would you?  You’d be an advanced spirit-person, or an alien.  Not a human being like everyone else.”

“Well if I ascended, it’s a reasonable way to leave.  I hate just dying like…”

She finished my sentence. “…like human beings.”

“OK,” I said.  “So what?”


If everyone who heard the news of my ascending, I thought, they’d think I’d been a spiritual Somebody.  Not a human.

Silence.  Then, “Go on.  Finish your thought experiment.”

So I’m not a human being, I thought.  I’m one who seemed like a human for years, but wasn’t.  I was not one of us.  My life would be seen as a mystery…after all, he didn’t die, like mortals do, he ascended!  He had this non-human sort of sparkly body, and a supernatural mind.  Everything he wrote, they were not for us to read, there’s no point in playing with the ideas.  None of what he lived can possibly apply to plain-vanilla human beings.  All his life, all those ideas he wrote, they don’t apply to us!

“Oh,” I said.  “So I sense that you’d prefer for me to forget the ascension.”


“In that case, I guess I’d prefer to skip it.”


“I care about what I’ve written, more than I care about ascending.  That doesn’t seem quite fair, but…”

“It’s your choice.”

“Maybe I couldn’t do it, ascending.”

“Maybe you couldn’t,” the one at the left said.

“But if I did…”

“No one would believe you were human.”

“Oh.  Is this your test for me,” I said.  “This your Test Number 2405?”

“You thought of this one,” a spirit said, “the ascension.  We don’t number your tests.”

’Cause there’s so many of yours, I thought.  The meeting was nearly over.

“Anything else?” a guardian asked.  “Anything you’re having trouble with, for now?”

“Well, about the woman…”

There was a sigh from one of the guides.  “Do you want us to ask her to knock on your door?  You just decided not to ascend, your own choice of what nobody’s done.  But you can’t somehow find a way to meet your amazing woman, with all the technology…  If you really wanted to meet each other, somehow we think you and she… we think you could do that on your own.”

In the silence, the guides nodded, one after another.  They agreed.  We could do that.

I didn’t agree.  If I wanted to be un-lonely, though, if that was my top priority…  well, maybe.

My spirit guides vanished, and I woke and found human furniture, around me in the room, not the curved table.  I was back in my belief of earth, once again.  I sighed.  Had I agreed for a conventional death, for the sake of the books?  Sure enough, I had.

This one, my belief of the woman, was she not my destiny, was she a personal whim of mine?  And am I her whim, too, or was our meeting designed to be a test?  The spirits said no.  What if she’s a spirit already?  How can I find her, then?

Like so many other mortals, I need to think about that.


(* Thanks to Bruce Harman, at www.harmanvisions.com for the use of his painting of someone else who decided to ascend.)

124 thoughts on “A Special Meeting of Spirit Guides

  1. I think I was born knowing that I was looking for someone, missing someone…. If I could go back and tell my 18 year old self that he will not find her in the next 50 years, he would be horrified – what would be the point of his life?

    The point, perhaps, has been to develop as a whole person, albeit painfully slowly and with much resistance…. Having come through the hardest few years of my life, experiencing overwhelming grief, illness and depression, I believe I am now a stronger, happier person. That I can be moved to tears of gratitude for all the blessings in my life has come as a big revelation.

    It is a strange feeling, the realisation that I am nearer the end of my life than the beginning. I may never find her in this lifetime but now, looking back, I’m kind of relieved I didn’t meet her then.

    I’m still learning and I think the best is yet to come. It only takes a second to meet someone…

    • I have met a lot of someone’s and married a few. I am here to attest, that is not the answer to happiness. In fact in my case, it mirrors even more for me where my personal pitfalls are! And let me tell you, I would rather have not seen some of my shortcomings. Have I grown, yes, but it was not easy. I have the gift (or not) of recalling bits and pieces of other lives and I was meant to meet these men to hopefully, remember that I am already love. Some days I do and some days…not so much! Maybe it’s for us to rediscover that in ourselves we have the perfect one…just sayin’.

    • Hello ~
      Yes, we grow older. Not all who sought us found us. Some did. Mine were not who I was seeking though. Perhaps.

      I was touched by your words about being alone. Friends, lovers and family dying. Puppies to raise. Still having something to teach. Someone.

      I wonder, if our paths would cross today, if you would have looked at me anything like you would have in years gone by?

      Our Spirit still enjoys beauty and seeks it, likes the joy it brings and gives to us.

      But now, I am old. So they say. And see.

  2. Dear Chang,
    Death is only a state of mind. The consciousness is bigger than that. With the deterioration of body, death is only a welcome friend. Go in peace. Wanted to meet you in person but maybe another dimension.

    • Of course I am. Yet only if she’s a remarkable person, having learned so much more that I’ve learned. I know of one who begins to meet my little requirements, but she has her own challenges: children to raise, lovely work to do, in a country half a world away. I have my own difficulties for her: a puppy to raise, some words to write, in a remote corner, distant her own. We’re friends never to meet is this flash-bulb lifetime. In adventures beyond time, as all of us have, I know we’ve met before, and will again.

      • Why does this remarkable woman that you are searching for need to have learned so much more than you have learned? How about maybe she has simply learned lessons in different areas from yours, and her knowing will complement your own?

  3. It’s hard to put into words, but I think everything is very ordinary we’ve just forgotten the knowledge to understand it. I believe it’s a game, and if there wasn’t some kind of penalty for not playing to the end we’d all pack it in before we got our first tooth. So if we don’t go down the snakes and up the ladders and reach 100 we don’t get the ice cream or whatever prize for finishing. As you said in one of your books, we chose to do this, it is meant to be fun. We went to see a film the other night and Billy Connelly is dying and he says something like, you want to die, but when you are dying, you want to stay. A bit like hating a job until you hand in your notice and then you start to enjoy it because you can see the end. Maybe we need to know exactly when the end will be in order to enjoy life, because even though we know it will end, we still live our lives like we will be here forever. Fearing death is the only thing that keeps us here, perhaps it’s really just fear of not getting the prize. Maybe death is ascension to those who are dying, until we do it for real we can’t know for sure. Sorry to ramble a bit you might want to edit this.

    Sort of connected to this is a comic strip in a daily paper when I was growing up. It was about a group of kids and every year they would go to the seaside and look at the crabs in the rockpool. The strip would then be about the crabs and how they would be getting excited about the phenomenom of the “Eyeballs in the Sky.” It became a religious experience for the crabs. I think things are pretty mundane and what we don’t understand is just “eyeballs in the sky.”

    I understand about feeling lonely, I used to have a friend and we would read books on astrology and new age stuff and test ideas on each other and not once did either of us say “that’s too deep for me.” Then when she was forty she died. I was a bit cross because I thought, now she knows it all and can’t tell me. My husband and friends listen and then say “that’s too deep for me.” I think they think I’m not all there, my trouble is I’m more there than here.

    • Sally, I can relate to your story about your friend. My very best friend left this plane a couple of years ago this month, right before I got married. The timing was uncanny. I miss her like crazy at times, and I crave that type of relationship. I’m willing to keep my heart open for friendship and allow it to come in a form that’s unfamiliar and unexpected. It’s not easy but I’ve had a lot of practice and reason to believe that the Universe fills us in with more than we expect. My mom died when I was young and it seems that she made sure through many, many connections that I would have multiple someones to care for me. When I think about how generous people have been towards me, I’m amazed and humbled. Love abounds.

  4. Thoughts-
    Aren’t we all on spirit-persons, each on his or her path to advancement, choosing to live in this human form?
    Were I to witness your sparkly ascension, I would know that what you’ve written in the books I so love is t r u t h. I would not think less of the books as a result, but more. I think that would hold true for any of us who visit you here.

    I remember your description of Leslie – to paraphrase – a star bright mind in the body of a goddess. That suited that Richard. Perhaps this Richard needs to be open to a star bright mind who no longer needs a body. Maybe Puff? Or maybe like Puff, she will begin to talk with you when you are ready for her.

    Good Morning, Richard.

    • What an amazing life she’s written in her books! And more books to come. Did I know that this little site would be quite so astonishing?

        • Thank you Parris! That image never fades, does it? Could you tell us, please, the title of just one of your books that we would most love to read now?

          • Richard, I would not even presume to suggest one of my romance novels to you and your metaphysical followers. What folly that would be on my part. Enough for me to learn lessons from your out-of-the-box mind. But thank you for the opportunity.

          • What a courteous thing to think, and to say! We can find your books, for our own curiosity, at parrisaftonbonds.com.

  5. i just want to thank you for your writings. I read Illusions for the first time in 1980. It was given to me by a beautiful young woman after an amazing conversation in which she decided my thoughts matched the book. She gifted me her copy immediately, and asked that as I met other like minded souls, I gift Illusions to them as well. In the last 34 years I have given away my copy over 20 times (and ran out to by another) not to mention how many times I have reread it myself. Most of the souls I gifted your story to have also carried on the tradition. I thought perhaps you would find this interesting. Thank you again for sharing with the spirits of this world….those of us that recognize being on our path are grateful……Matthew

  6. Richard: For many years I believed in “what you hold in your mind you bring into your reality” and still do. I’ve seen remarkable proof of it. Most recently I decided to consider building a Volmer Sportsman amphibian, perhaps finishing a long forgotten project that someone else had put many hours of labor into. I searched websites and found the perfect paint scheme for my plane. I printed off the picture and carried it around with me for about 6 months while I travelled on business and looked at some unfinished projects that might fit the bill. The one night in my hotel room I was looking at the Barnestormers website and discovered the exact aircraft I had carried a picture of was for sale. It turned out to be located in Maine (I live in Ontario, CAN). I drove out there and bought it and it now resides in my hangar.
    Proof of concept? Perhaps. But another idea has reached its way into my consciousness and that is the concept of Karma. Not in the sense I once thought, ie. being reincarnated according to my deeds in a previous life, but getting exactly in this life what I have earned. It’s a powerfull concept and just perhaps, by holding an image in my mind or carrying a picture of a particular plane with me for half a year, might just cause certain actions on my part that allow me to have this thing. Earned through Karma in other words.
    I bring this up because if there is any truth in the idea, perhaps we all need to evaluate our ‘luck’ in realtion to our previous deeds. Now for the deeper question. “Have you earned your female friend through your previous actions with other female friends?”

    • Thank you, Earl. I so agree. That which we love will be reflected in our live(s). Looking back, one life goes like a flash of lightning. Looking forward, it seems to take forever. The reflections, though, are always around us.

      • The same counts for me. Becoming a jet fighter pilot was impossible, because of a lack of talent in understanding mathematics. But Jonathan Livingstone, Donald Shimoda and you Richard, as a jet pilot writing about flying at night in a F-84 F, helped keeping the dream of flying alive. I got a job as a corrector (which was a nice job anyway) and spent my money on flying lessons and so I got my flying licence.

        I was very sad to be forced to quit flying when I lost my job, could not find another soon enough, but making my dream come true and actually learning to fly is one of my best memories and something I am proud of. It keeps that spirit alive which makes me open for change and doing things better than I do now.

        I also succeeded in making another dream come true: the dream of Love. I met that special woman who is beautiful, witty, wise and totally honest. We both have our shortcomings and flaws, but we understand and keep learning from each other and wish to become old together.

        Indeed: when you really set your mind to something, your wishes will come true in some form whatsoever!

  7. There are sooo many ways you can yet write your story… surey you are not limited by a finte number of ‘ends’?
    ‘Time’ seens to be the utimate illusion and perhaps our ‘mortal’ bodies are a metaphorical llustraton of our current relationship with that mystery & only when we accept ‘now’ fully wll we see thngs as they truly are.
    I would like to believe ‘she’ has always been with you and you will see her ‘body’ when you see your own for what it is – a reminder and reassurance that this current ‘journey’ is safely ‘limited’ and the perfect ‘destination’ is yet assured. It is the proof that time still has work to do and will not allow any of us to miss the ultimate flight.
    In the meantime you are not alone in your loneliness but you have certainly helped others feel less alone in theirs.
    Thanks for sharing ‘life’ with us.

    • Emma – you are onto something really important here when you say, “…only when we accept ‘now’ fully will we see things as they truly are.” The past is not real. It exists only in our memory and is given meaning only in our recounting which means that we are free to change the past. We need simply ‘remember’ it differently. And of course the future is purely ficticious since by the time it gets here it is ‘now’. And thus the ‘now’ is all we really have and the least appreciated commodity in our lives. I awaken each morning and give thanks to the universe for being alive today and able to “re-invent” myself in the ‘now’. I think that a lot of lonliness and discontent is born out of looking to an imagined ‘future’ and missing the all-important ‘now’.

  8. Richard,

    I am a new writer although not a young man. I have drawn a lot of inspiration from your books. I have written a series of books and two other individual books. The series and one of my children’s books has been reviewed. I have had lots of encouragement from Kirkus and the reviews were quite complimentary. I’m doing what I can to move forward with publishing, but it is complicated.. The writing was strangely easy for me, although I never thought I could be a writer. Then I didn’t think anyone would like my writing, but they did. So now I’m working at finding the path to publish and see if I can make a positive impact on the world like you. Do you have any advice or a push. I’d really be honored if you read one of my books and tell me what you think.

    Regarding your writi8ng here; I’ve attempted suicide as a young man on two occasions. The second being when I was 16. I decided to live my life to it’s conclusion and I’m so glad I did. I’d have never seen around the corner to find my wife, an impact on little bits of the world that was positive and I would have missed some of the joy and love that made my life’s most happy moments. I don’t think that could be different for anyone’s life. We simply never know what we don’t know. I hope you continue to find your path to connect to love and joy.

    Bob Polston

    • One of the tests for a writer is that almost always it takes time, one book after another, and then! are our books discovered. Today we have Amazon (if we haven’t met an editor who loves our writing). I once had an editor, she has gone now, other publishers don’t care for my work, so I turn to Amazon, and to this little website. What’s going to happen? We never know. Never-knowing is part of this profession.

  9. Very interesting – reminds me of Illusions – glad you chose not to ascend – you do have more to offer the world. I want you to know that you have profoundly affected my life. I too have wondered why it is so hard to find a man who is interested in the things I am – reads the things I read – accepts me as I am. Have you ever wondered if it’s because society does not go out and meet people anymore? Everything is Facebook – online dating (scares the you know what out of me). Maybe we don’t know how to go out and just meeting people anymore? It also seems when you’re older – it’s harder to meet people.

      • I relate to all said here…. on impulse (and ever appreciating that a chance conversation/chance post can lead to an enchanted bit of the unforseen in one’s life) am moved to mention one thing that’s been such a blessing in my life, and that’s contra dance. Google will bring up lots. Contra is all over the country, is more a ‘community’ dance where almost all change partners every dance instead of the usual ‘exclusive’/me-and-my partner only dance with each other sort of thing. Think ambiance of some old timey foot stompin small town barn dance. Most everyone wants to help everyone else out. More a neighborly thing than folks getting their neck out of joint cause of skill level. From youngsters to oldsters. As the experienced dancer/difference-maker at my first dance said: “Look at this, and tell me how many folks you see who are not smiling…”.
        Many video clips on web of course but my first choice (as it shows some bird’s eye views from above) is a 3min. one just google… ” crowfoot in tacoma “.

        Thank you Richard and the many remarkable folk who post here.

  10. That was a fascinating interaction you had Richard. I’ve also thought ascending is the way to go, sparkly body and all. Sounds like fun. But your spirit friends make a good point. I’ve also heard of people who say goodbye to their loved ones, close their eyes and they’e gone. Doctors still put a label on it like “heart failure” or just “old age” if they don’t know what it is and don’t want to look silly. I think a peaceful way to go would be nice.

    As far as women are concerned, what if the idea that there’s just one special woman out there for us is a throwback from caveman times when we lived in small tribes and there really was just one woman for each of us? A thought impression from long ago stuck in our genes. What if today with 7 billion people on the planet and roughly half of them female, we actually have thousands of special women that would fit the bill? I know for me that makes it feel a lot easier and more possible to meet her.

    Then there’s the thing that happened a few weeks ago. I met a woman online and we hit it off immediately. She virtually became my insta-girlfriend. And to my surprise I realized all those in-love feelings I hadn’t felt for years were just as alive as ever. And then things took a turn and it was over. But something interesting remained…a lesson?

    It was the fact that during this whirlwind week with her, lots of other women suddenly began flirting with me and coming on to me. It made me wonder, “where were all of you when I was lonely?” My love life before was dry as Death Valley, tumbleweeds and all. And then this oasis filled with women shows up. And now the oasis is gone too. Was it all just my own thoughts? Did the thought “I have a girlfriend” and believing it open some doorway within me and start drawing more of the same into my life? I’m going to experiment with this one.

  11. 🙂 Love this one especially! I really do get frustrated with all this humanness and then I remember that maybe, just maybe, that is what I came to have…a human experience! Although I’ve done mine a bit more quietly than yours, I still believe I chose this…most of the time, that is! 😉
    I lightly touched on this with one of your other posts, the loneliness… In my experience, I don’t think another body is going to do it for me. I have a perfectly good partner right now, two daughters, a lovely granddaughter and one on the way but I can’t seem to shake this sense of loneliness that is so deep and profound, it is indescribable even to me. I try to rationalize it…age…depression…aging body…but I know in my heart that is not it. It is like I’m feeling a sadness beyond this world; some would attribute it to Mother Earth. I just don’t have an explanation. For about 4-5 years now, I feel as if I’m just going through the motions…acting out a role. Where is the joy I once felt? Have I accomplished what I came for and am just too stubborn to move on or is it something much, much bigger? Did some of us come for something much larger than what it appears and as we look at our world, maybe I/we feel a sense of failure because it certainly seems to be a mess out there. I honestly have no answers…just know what I feel. But you, my dear friend, whom I have never met in person :-), you already are one of my spirit guides and have been for many, many years and it is my wish that you will continue to be so in this world or not! I feel in you I have a true partner on the path.

  12. I’m glad you chose not to ascend. Imagine…ascending just as that amazing woman comes knocking on your door, looking for her lost dog, who somehow slipped her leash and took off.

  13. I think we really get to know ourselves in the eyes of another person. I know I really like myself a lot more when I’m around certain people who bring out the best in me. Of course, on the other hand, there are certain people who make me want to do a quick ascension. It often takes more than just one relationship to make us whole. I think it’s very rare that we find a one-size-fits-all type person and very often we wind up disillusioned about our choices. I think we fall in love with a person who makes us feel really good about ourselves, but that’s just my humble opinion. We are a narcissistic bunch of souls.

  14. Dear Richard,
    I have been in your state of wishing more often than I care to count. In my experience, the right lady appears some time after your decision to enjoy life, with the activities you enjoy most, by yourself.
    Good luck, and keep away from wires!
    Or, in the words of John Irving: “Keep passing the open windows!”

  15. Your words today remind me of two years ago, when I was ready to leave. All set, ready, nothing left to do……then I was still here, hours went missing, then a friend calls and said they saw me. I was talking to my guides, they told me I had things left to do,yet it was up to me, I decided to stay..
    I had to trust that, since I am still here. When I get tired of it all, I bring myself back to joy by remembering the mystery of it all. So many experiences, still have that guy to meet, people to help, books to read, stories to tell, writing, go back to painting, which I’m still aiming to do……one of these days….ha! Life is crazy. Wildly crazy. And I’ll die when it’s all done. Right on time. But that guy……..the books to write, the stories to tell……..
    Blessings Richard.

  16. Dear Richard: Since I lost my daughter almost 35 years ago (and you came into my life to help me not only live through that heartbreaking time but to become more than I ever would have been) I have shouted at Spirit a number of times that the way we do death is barbaric. That we should just be able to say our loving goodbyes and ascent. The losing of one we love is hard enough, but to have to deal with the body left behind without the love and life to fill it is even harder.

    I’m glad you didn’t choose to leave. You still have so much to give and so many of us who need what you give, but someone needs to be the first to ascend so that we know we have that choice. And then others of us can learn to do it. How about a Handbook for Ascension? Boy would I read and reread that one. You could still stay much longer and those of us who have really heard your message would know it is all for us–even the choice to ascend.

    My heartfelt wish for you is that you find joy again. A soaring joy that makes you so glad you are alive! It is who you are. And maybe, just maybe when you learn to be that alone, you will be ready for your destiny to come into your life. You can’t look for someone else to make you whole–you become whole and then just maybe you’ll find another person who is whole and together you can soar. And come back to enjoy the love you’ve found for many many more years. You know it’s all yours. Enjoy it.

  17. I lost my husband and best friend within a few months of each other and it was a very depressing time for me; however, I took great comfort in something you wrote, Richard:

    “Don’t be dismayed at good-byes. A farewell is necessary before you can meet again. And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends.”

  18. Richard, go ahead and ascend. I have never thought you were a mere mortal, especially after your hi-wire act. The reason we ‘die’ and do not ascend is because we believe that’s the way it is. You taught me that in “Illusions”, still one of my favorite books.

      • Don’t remember ever seeing an instruction book on ascension, but a way is mentioned in Ramtha’s first book, The White Book, edited by Steven Lee Weinberg, who coincidentally, published it from Eastsound, WA. (1986 edition.)

  19. I hope I am not out of place, But felt the need to share this and believed this was a good time and place to do so.
    I have bin reading a book called.
    Transitions a nurse’s education about life and death.
    By Becki Hawkins
    ISBN 978-0-9847445-0-3
    I found her thru a friend of a friend and met her in person at a book signing a very nice and gentle woman.
    so far a good read but I find read a chapter and think quite a wile about it before I can read another.
    Becki was a nurse, hospice oncology nursing, home health/hospice, hospice chaplain, and later a hospice volunteer.
    The book is s a collection of stories from her patients. about how they deal with their impending deaths.

  20. I wonder how many people have come back like Jonathan. Linda Goodman said in Gooberz that we can change bodies, I thought about this when we were all playing Cluedo and my brother and neice went out and my sister played their pieces for them. I think this life reflects our real life. There are some amazing people around now, some on television who claim it is all illusion, well us on this website, we know all about illusions don’t we, and there are those in the scientific community saying the same thing. Ascend if you must Richard, but promise to come back and tell us all about it – straight away.

  21. So many layers to this post. I am fascinated at the way your mind works, the way you construct thought-sentences and what you do not say.

  22. This is a wonderful story. it speaks to me about perfect imperfection of human life. Yes we’re all perfect souls but we all signed up to come here. So as much a perfectionist I may be I always remind myself that it’s the essence of being human- having this imperfect, painful, volatile experience for a life. And for a death too.

  23. When I read “Hypnotizing Maria” I think I really GOT it – how we create walls and circumstances in our life with our thoughts and the stories we tell. Don’t you think the wall or story of loneliness is created the same way?
    This is such an interesting conversation. It’s been my impression from your writings and interviews that you didn’t really enjoy this physical life, that you would rather be somewhere else, somewhere “spiritual”. Curious to me that you chose to stay despite all the nasty medical things you had to endure. I adore our physical life (despite all its difficulties). I want to stay around as long as possible but I think (wouldn’t know for sure unless I was there) that I would want to check out if I had serious injuries to face.

    • In the dream state of a coma, I never thought that I had injured myself, since that has never happened before. I was dreaming! But when someone asked if I wanted to go back to this world, I said yes. I needed to say goodbye to my dear friend Sabryna. Nobody mentioned, by the way, that my body was trapped in a hospital! Not long after waking up, I discovered that it is often a lot harder to leave to leave this lifetime than it is from the physical-free state of the afterlife. One word, and we’re back here! Next I heard that Puff was a wreck, so of course I could never leave that lovely airplane without putting her back into perfect flying condition. That’s done. Now I’m homesick for the place I saw. How do I get back there (without crashing things)?

      • Richard, this remembers me of your short story “Home on another planet?” I often have that feeling of being a stranger on a strange planet. I often ask myself: “I wonder how the flying is back home”.

      • In 2007, I had a 6 month period of intermittent -peace love joy and oneness- PLOJO – that was a completely astounding to experience. Towards the end I could go into that state at will. Then it started to fade.

        But I knew that it was my truth. And I’ve been playing with knowing that and also flickering in and out of the paradigm of duality. I’ve made it a game. I really enjoy playing it, most days.

        Did you ever play Pac-man? It was a lot of fun even though there were always hungry ghosts chasing you! The trick is just believing that you can play as much as you want even when they “get you.” For me hungry ghosts usually show up as “people who don’t yet know that we are all one.”

  24. Richard, since you weren’t really dead, are you sure it was the afterlife you visited? Perhaps it was just a different dimension, an alternate reality. (of course, the afterlife is just an alternate reality, but you know what I mean.) Perhaps, when you really do cease living this life, you’ll wind up someplace else? I’ve always thought that after I die, I’ll spend a bit of time in someplace that looks the way I imagine a Greek temple or Atlantis to look…tall columns, white marble, you know…and I’ll review my life lessons and decide where to go next. I’m hoping my Mom and Dad are there, but who knows, maybe they’ve already moved on to the next life.I’ve wondered for a long time how to reconcile my belief in multiple lifetimes with my belief that those who go on ahead are waiting for us…perhaps the Higher Self is waiting, while the spirit goes on to a new life? Do we all have a Higher Self still out there in the cosmos, a Self we can call on for help or guidance or whatever…can our Higher Self communicate with the Higher Selves of others and pass on information? Questions, I’ve got questions!

    • I thought about that, Sharon. It could have been a dream, had someone not asked (three times), “Do you want to go back to your life on Earth?” I thought I was dreaming, no idea at first that I had left Earth. Your questions are excellent. I have my answers, but there are many good books, lots of good research about the subject written in the last thirty years.

    • Sharon, have you ever read C.S. Lewis – _The Great Divorce_? It is amazing and posits some fascinating theories about the afterlife. Highly recommend it.

  25. I’m sorry for the loneliness that you are expressing. I’m sad that leaving us is what you feel would be the best next choice. I know that your wonderful new companion and the spruced up Puff isn’t everything one needs to feel complete. But I do hope that you find a renewed interest in finding some answers here on earth. There are a lot of us living on this planet — it would be nice to think there are at least a handful who would fit your criterion.

    You might want to read a book called “One”. I found it beautifully inspiring as my marriage collapsed and I questioned my place on this earth.

    Sending lots of love,

    • It’s the same for anyone who’s alone: there’s a reason for it, and it’s our mission, should we choose to accept it, to find out why. And maybe I have.
      This is an unusual website, a few personal things in a public place, and bright minds to visit. A stranger could find my problem in half a minute: He lives in an isolated place with views high away to forever; he won’t move from there; he loves to share ideas with a brilliant beautiful woman; her age means nothing (well, less than 40 he thinks must be pushing it); he meets no one; he has no family but a Sheltie puppy and one dear friend; his office is his mind, you can tell him right what to do and he won’t do it. Yet, he cares for an electric family he has never met. I’ll read _One,_ and if I find the other One, I’ll tell you. I can’t imagine, save for a single missing spirit, a better life than this one.
      Thank you for your love, Sabrina. How much it matters!

    • Why, you’re right, Jerianne! Could it be, lacking an antonym, that we’ve been given the power to convene a meeting of spirit guides?

      • Thesaurus.com lists eight antonyms for ‘lonely’. Two of them are ‘loved’ and ‘close’. But we knew that, didn’t we?

  26. I know this is the wrong place for this, I think this was last week, but I’m a bit slow, but I just wanted to say that the best part of you moderating is that we know you are reading what we write. It’s magical.

  27. What is it about this web site that makes it so magical?! I know it’s Richard Bach who, in 40-some years, has never written anything boring. Or anything which hasn’t transported me far beyond where and what I once was. And the comments! They leave my mind and spirit swirling, soaring, pondering… I don’t know, it’s just so different from anything else I’ve experienced.

    A couple of thoughts. I strongly suspect/fear that if you were to ascend, with witnesses, the world would have a new religion to contend with. I’m reminded of the Pageites from “One”. And somewhere along the way, your words, your truth, would be turned upside down and we’d have the Bachian-Christian wars. *shudder*

    OK, maybe just that one thought. The loneliness I know well, but I have no answers. I also prefer living away from people, but I’m not sure why that should be an obstacle. Especially considering that the only people I’ve ever connected with have avoided the normal social gatherings like the plague! And every one of them I met by sheer “accident”. Good friends, some of them, but never a soulmate. The closest I’ve come to that was online, oddly enough, and also purely accidental. Thanks to all for a fascinating discussion! 🙂

  28. Richard, I’m sorry you’re down, and hope you will soon be soaring again. Several times reading a book you’ve written has encouraged me to become a better … human, and I thank you for that; you’ve provided stepping stones across turbulent streams. There are days when I, too, wonder if I am a human, because people can seem so very strange — and those days they think that I am so very strange. We’re all perfectly imperfect, each in our own flaws, sometimes failing to achieve what we dream, but failing is a result, not a state of being. Be well.

    • HTom – I love your beautiful image: Richard’s books have provided ‘stepping stones across turbulent streams.’ I can picture it in my mind, as it has been exactly the same for me.
      And Richard, thank you again so very much! Peace to you today.

  29. He will not let me finish reading ‘Curious Lives’ to him, because he finds the idyllic closeness so enchanting, he literally cannot bear the prospect of even a tinge of sadness occurring on a following page….

    We more or less left it at “What have I done, he thought, that I deserve this beautiful creature to love me”….

    At least 18 months has passed, we may never know the ‘ending’….!

    From my heart, from where I stand…. Love is never ‘deserved’…. Or ‘earned’….
    (That is a different emotion altogether).

    “The most difficult part of attaining perfection is finding something to do for an encore.” ~Author Unknown

    Perhaps, he is seeking Perfection… Not Love?

    • You will never know, Cindy, unless you read on. It’s just like this life (hate thought I do to say it)…you must live the ending to know how it feels. : )

  30. Sometimes I wonder if each of us makes our own decision of when and how we will go Home to the Other Side, maybe by ourselves or maybe with the guidance of our Higher Self and our Spirit Guides. Or is there ever a time when the decision to leave is made for us for our own good? Who decides when we leave?

    Some people that I have known that went to the Other Side were not Happy here, were tired of being here, or expressed feelings of just plain being done here, so they left and it seemed like it was their decision to do so. On the other hand when a couple of friends I had suddenly left (not at the same time) it felt to me like someone else (Higher Self? Guides?) had either made the decision or at least recommended to them in some way that they leave here. It was rather “spooky” to me when others they had known felt the same thing and started talking about it.

    Richard, I am very grateful that we have others like our Higher Selves, our Spirit Guides, and other people who share our beliefs (including you and others on this website) to connect to, to learn from, and to get guidance from. I hope that you can find a way to discover who the friend you are looking for is and where she is but still be able to do the things you want to do here. I also hope that you are Happy!


    • Fascinating ideas! If we ask them, of course our highest selves can suggest paths for us to consider. As some here have made suggestions for me. Valuable counsel! Thank you, Bobbi.

      • Is it possible to explore what Bobbi has expressed about what her friends had felt when that couple passed away…that ‘spooky’ occurance of a sort of spirit guide deciding things or similar? Like what i tried to express in a recent mail.

          • The two people I was talking about that I felt might have left here because someone else made that decision did not know each other and had passed over years apart from each other. When the first one left in a small plane crash and I had those feelings, I kept that to myself at first — then others started expressing the same idea, even a few who didn’t really know him but had heard about what had happened. A similar reaction happened among the friends of the second person when he left here only on a smaller scale. What made this “spooky” to me is that first I had never really thought about someone else making the decision about us leaving here, and second that others had the same sense about these two people. There were many thoughts among those of us who talked afterwards about “why’ we thought their guides decided they should leave. Some suggestions included ideas like that they were no longer doing what they came here to do, that they were really unhappy here but didn’t realize it and were going through life in a robotic manner, or that they were needed someplace else.

          • Bobbi, you’ve opened a fascinating avenue for me…the many reasons why some of us finish our lives here and go home. Last night I talked with my mother, who died nearly fifty years ago. She said that I could come over any time I wished, did I think there were negative aspects from traveling from one room to the belief of another? There are none at all. Yet she said it would be well to give some thought to others who have connected with me, and how they might feel if I moved now. Good advice for all of us!

  31. Walking one evening along a path lined with Wattle trees ( mimosa , name in French ) on the Gold Coast of Australia , I was lamenting and asking myself WHY am I ALONE ??? And before I could end my question …. A sort of strong flash of lightning appeared in my minds eye and slashed and split the boldly drawn word ALONE. after the letter ” L ” and added another ” L ” to form these two words …..ALL ONE…….this all happened in a SPLIT second ! It scared me and in a flash I understood the message and in a flash I was home not alone but …..ALL in ONE …. If anyone had a similar experience or could enlighten me on the matter. ??? Please share thanks !

    • I was cleaning my teeth and looked into the mirror to see a new friend’s eyes looking back at me, at that moment I had a flash in my mind’s eye of two beings standing together, one of them looking through my eyes, through my friend’s eyes and back to the other being. That’s when the idea that we are characters in a game crystallised. I looked in the mirror again and there was only me, what a relief! It gave the greeting “I see you” a whole new meaning. I think these glimpses are far more common than we think, but people deny them for many reasons. I believe we are all one, and for that reason we need to understand someone’s actions not condemn them. No man is an island and all that, I think it is true.

  32. In my mid-twenties I met someone in a doorway at a party, we just started talking and he said “we haven’t met before have we?” and I said “no.” “But I feel like we know each other,” “so do I” I said. Then we met again at the laundrette, chatted about washing and the quality of clothing. The last time was in a pub, I was with my boyfriend, he with his girlfriend and we were chatting to each other about nothing really, and our long-term partners were looking at each other and you could see them thinking, how have we not met before but they seem to know each other so well? I never knew his name, have never seen him since. I sometimes wonder if he was me.

    • Sally, i had a similar experience a few years ago. It was after reading Richard’s book ‘ One’ and i was very conscious of my surroundings. I entered a small bank building to do an ATM transaction and there in the hall was a homeless sort of lady, keeping warm cause it was cold outside-she was ungroomed and talking to herself and smoking….She had a worn out wool coat on. There were other people waiting in line to use the machine of whom hadn’t paid much attention to her. She and I made eye contact and in my second hand French (it was here in Belgium) i reminded her that smoking is not good for her health, costly, and it was not permitted in the building. We struck up a conversation and she was telling me about her life a bit….and in a split instant i felt i had met one of my alternative selves of perhaps the future of which i hadn’t chosen–far removed from who i was today and then and a self i think from somewhere else. But in that moment i found immediate oneness….that i was one with her. Her hair was like mine, her old wrinkled face could have been mine in the future if i had her habits, etc…Looking back it was Richard’s book that sparked the possibilites of those thoughts and i think reminded me of what we have the power to experience. How we can meet up with ourselves. It gave me great compassion for her. In fact, i have experienced this a few times in my life, but with different messages.

      • It’s so nice to hear of a similar experience, thank you for sharing it Jennifer. I love the part in Illusions where it says ‘Rarely do members of the same family grow up under the same roof,” and I wonder if our families are just different aspects of ourselves. In the Celestine Prophecy they have soul groups, but if we are all one then I suppose we are all variations of the One. But we do have connections with some people more than others, and then we have these experiences of such knowing that stand out from the rest. Maybe she was an alternate you and he was a male version of me. There is so much to know.

    • Sally, your comment has me wondering about something. Since I was a teenager, people (usually women) I have met for the first time very frequently say right off, “Your face looks so familiar. Where have I met you before?” And of course I say “No, I don’t think we’ve met,” because I don’t recognize them, and it has always been easy for me to remember both faces and names. I usually make some inane comment about how I just seem to have a face that people think they have seen before. That is what I have always believed, as I didn’t have any other explanation.

      Now I am wondering if these people are actually me, in some form that I don’t recognize, or others that I have known in past lives and times. Can anyone think of any additional explanations for this phenomenon? Now I’m curious!

      • I also get the “where do I know you from” line about half the time I meet someone that I’ve never met. I have taken to saying, “Oh yes, you probably remember me from the Oneness. We’re very close there!”

  33. When people close to me have died I usually dream of them shortly afterwards. They are always very healthy and happy and I wake up feeling like it was real. My mum would come to me repeatedly in my dreams and assure me that she was no longer ill, she’d been ill all my life. There seems to be a different feel between these dreams and those I have where they just feature as part of a group.

    When our cat died, we looked out of the window and there was a robin dancing about on a branch of our very young tree, the first bird we’d seen. My husband said “do you think that’s Smudgie?”. We didn’t tell anyone that. A few weeks later a friend sent us a glass inkwell with a little glass robin shaped bird on the stopper. She wrote saying that she felt she had to buy it for us because of Smudgie. So we know he’s still with us.

    Sorry Richard, thinking a lot today and rambling off subject, feel free to edit. I have a friend who says there is nothing after this world and that she has always thought that, but she has not had a happy life, so I wonder, if she thought that, why she made the choices she did. She would say she had no choices. I do not like being a victim, and many years ago I read Shirley MacLaine and she said that we choose our life. That made me feel so much happier, to know that I was responsible for my own life, that I chose it. Of course, I would like very much to know why I chose it. I had my palm read and most of that has happened, one thing left. But being a contrary human I don’t really want to know my future on earth, I just want to know everything else. One thing the palmist told me was that I would never have a serious illness, so I tend to panic when I’ve been in the minor injuries unit.

    Don’t be down Richard, you know when we should be crying you can always find my sister and I hiding somewhere giggling uncontrollably, and completely inappropriately. We’re just wired that way. Have a cry and then have a giggle. Just don’t let anyone see you giggling.

    • About this phenomenon of dreaming about people who have transitioned away from the earthly plane – I sometimes dream about people several days before they take that journey. The dreams are usually of folks that I have not had contact with for some time, or that I know, but they aren’t close to me. When the dream happens, I always say to myself, “I will soon be hearing that this person is no longer living here in an earthly body.” And I do then hear that exactly that. But my dream will have come several days before the obvious fact of their “death.”

      Could it be possible that I am somehow picking up energy from a soul who is practicing being one place, and then the other? Going back and forth before the decision is ultimately made, and the final journey is accomplished? Is there any evidence that we can do that?

  34. I think everyone is the master of his or her universe, but we all tend to forget this simple fact. When we feel down and depressed, we forget that we put ourselves in that particular place for a certain reason and that maybe it’s time to get out of it now. Maybe that’s what’s difficult about having so many choices. It’s a lot easier to just back down and say I’m not responsible anymore; I just feel bad and just let me feel bad. It takes a great deal of will power to turn yourself around sometimes. It all just comes back down to “you are exactly what you’re thinking.” You can see your past or future self and you can see either one in present time, and you can find that special long-lost friend any time you’re really ready. If you don’t like who or what you are, you just change your mind. I think Illusions got it exactly right.

  35. We couldn’t make this Circle ourselves Richard, you are the mutual friend we all trust to keep us safe from fearful posters. That’s why this is so special and I’m very, very grateful to you.

  36. You ARE part of thie CiIRCLE , Richard , you started ” The Fearher ” rolling for us when back in 1980 my friend and I started experimenting after reading your book !!! Imagine , two young mothers pushing our wide eyed babies along the streets of New York ……, the very first item we chose to ” See ” or chose to “come to us ” was a simple feather ….. To make it more difficult we said , ” why not a shocking pink feather ? That would be real hard ! A few days later my friend had to go out of town and asked me to deliver a sample of her work to a three day Jewelry Fair at a New York address. I walked over still pushing my wide eyed son Jem ….. as I reached and entered the fair through the automatic double doors , I felt something gently tickling my feet, I looked down and saw thousands of shocking pink feathers surrounding my feet……. This time , it was mom that was wide eyed !!! The Uniiverse was telling me something in a humorous way , firmly but gently enlighting my friend and I even behind shocking pink colored glasses. !!! Now, Richard you will have to help us find the existing transparent feathers so we can build us some wings to………CIRCLE !!!!!………:) 🙂 🙂

  37. Jerianne , you were wondering why there is no opposite of lonely ???
    If you look closely it is actually staring us in the face …. Look at the word ” one ” it is located in between two l ‘s that puts the word ” one ” boxed in , then the letter ” y ” is for us to ask “WHY?” As Richard said earlier it gives us the power to convene a meeting of spirit guides who would rightfully explain to us ……” We are ONE in the Universe no time for loneliness …….. Only time for oneness !!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂

  38. Maaaaaaaaybe…..we have no opposite of “lonely” because so few of us have experienced this not-lonely thing. Maybe we came to this star like a kind of field trip to experience loneliness.

  39. If we didn’t experience loneliness would we still yearn or interact with others ? Or would we be so generous as to help others out of loneliness even if we are incapable of experiencing it ?? ……. I feel that loneliness could be a sort of formula of our. Creator to make us yearn …… ” TO BE ” …… Part of A PAST …. PRESENT …. FUTURE existence ; Eternally engulfing ourselves in an infectious LOVE ENERGY which creates and culminates into our cycle of life !!! 🙂 🙂 🙂

  40. Once when I was a teenager, I was with a friend in his back yard at night. We were lying on our backs in silence, staring up in amazement at the stars on an unusually clear Michigan evening. For a brief and startling moment, I had the very strong feeling that if I let myself go, I would have been sucked up into the stars… gone from the earth forever. I felt this possibility so powerfully and with such certainty, it frightened me… and I made a conscious effort to stay on earth. Then the feeling was gone, and I’ve never felt it since then. If I ever do get that feeling again while staring into the universe… I’m going to let go… and see what happens.

  41. Dear Richard , wish you lots of love n warmth. I discovered some beutiful ideas on love n life in mikhail naimy ‘book of mirdad’ . May your life be filled with optimism n love as your stories have filled mine.

  42. Dear Richard you explained ascension perfectly in A bridge across forever, all you have to do is sever the blue cord and walla earth no more!

  43. I just wish to say that for all the unbelievers if you always do your best and strive for success on all levels then eventually you will meet someone who is beyond perfect and you’ll be ready to experience absolute bliss and happiness. The point being he/she is out there but you have to be ready. I like how Richard wants so much in a partner, it shows the confidence he has in himself.

    • I agree on this! In short it’s the story of my life, with all it’s failures, bad luck and things that didn’t work out the way I planned them.

  44. Honestly, I read JLS all those years ago and to me it was another book – though very good and thought provoking. I read Illusions just a month or so ago, was impressed with the truth of it and translated to my mother tongue – a South Indian language. I am waiting to have it published!

    Talking of ascensions. Both my parents knew when and where they would die. My father died in 1985. Though his 2 sons had gone home to visit him (he was slightly indisposed), he got well in a couple of days and bid them to attend a marriage among relatives. They left at around 0830 hours. At 1000 hours, he called my mother, “Lakshmi, I want to go. Please bathe, prepare some payasa (a South Indian sweet dish made from rice). It was noon by the time it was done. He asked my mom to have early lunch. She doesn’t eat before he does. But he insisted. And so she did. He at a few spoonfuls of the payasa and told her, “Now, I am off.” In a minute or so, he was gone!

    My mother died on 24.12.2006. She had told me a month before that she would go shortly. We were out-of-town on that day and came to know that her story was similar. She decided at 1530 hours that she wished to ascend. Like my father, she asked the youngster at home to prepare Payasa. She went at 2000 hours. We were on our way back, were informed on the mobile that the doctor-neighbour confirmed her death at 2015 hours.

    So, Richard, ascension does not necessarily have to be any of the things you have imagined. It could be like any of the million journeys that you have undertaken during this life-time.

    • Umesh i loved your story….how honoring for your parents to have had the freedom of death. It is important to hear these stories…in the West we have so few. Thank you for sharing yours on this site. I hope to be able to convey my death as clearly as that when it is called for.

  45. Hello. I’m Lisa. The most un lonely that I ever felt was in 1992. I had gotten divorced. Was raising 2 daughters. Working crazy hours as a nurse. We were living close to the bone. I had been studying alternative healing, energy work, and had been fasting on brown rice for 5 days. Someone astral travelled through my window. Not kidding. It was the realest thing I have ever experienced to date. This person jumped right into my body and talked to me in some kind of non linear communication. Oh my goodness. This was intimacy. This was meeting a friend from across all time. bliss bliss.

  46. I have actually not met my spirit guide, however I have used my pendulum (rose quartz) to communicate with my spirit guide.
    I know that he is a male, I know his name and last name but he prefers to be called by his first, and I know how old he was when he passed. I have not worked with my pendulum in a while. I am very curious as to what he looks like so I will be trying this method very soon.

    Before communicating with him I pictured myself surrounded by white light, except I didn’t do the balloon method where you pinch the top. I asked my pendulum to only allow positive beings from the light come through, and to protect or warn me if I wasn’t speaking to my spirit guide. I also asked who I was speaking to during the session. I was told that if you ask something, whoever you’re talking to, is not allowed to lie if you ask it to speak in the name of the highest power. When I asked “Am I speaking to my spirit guide?” he confirmed that it was him I was speaking to.

    Just wanted to share.

    but i wish it was more indept of a meeting you had Richard! blessings

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